Sunday, March 21, 2010

commitment

all this time, even tho i appeared to be looking for love and relationship, when the real thing hit me i was scared. Im scared to commit myself, im scared of losing my freedom but most important is im scared of the pain.

after committing myself to some1 i can love i will start to be consume by nonsense thoughts, jealousy and unhappiness when that certain some1 fail to keep his promise, even a very simple promise like "i'll sms u later" n din do it

then i tend to compare how he used to treat me b4 i committed myself and how he's treating me now. then i'll get emo n unhappy

now, this is wat is happening to me after i decided to commit myself to a man i consider not bad. I din wanted to commit but after much persuasion n consideration i gave it a chance.. looks like im wrong. Sigh...

i feel so tired...
looks like it wont take me long to tell him "its enough"

guess im not the type to commit myself...